At times, I totally want to run away. It’s the most romantic adventure that I’ve long longed to experience. At least once in my life I hope to run away from the present tense for a while without consequences.
Fine. I can’t run away, as the matter of fact. But I walk away. I just do sometimes.
I just realized I’ve been moving every two years before. Due to a one-year postpone of graduation, it will be a third year, minimum, before I move out of this cornfield. Two years ago, I graduated from Olney Central College in summer and transferred to University of Illinois Urbana Champaign. EVERYWHERE IS FLAT. So when I saw mountains, I get so excited as if I’ve never seen one in my life. Very ridiculous.
The two years in Olney was one of the best time in my life. I had my close friends as my neighbors. When I was sentimental, I just went to next door and talked to them. Sometimes we would chill, have couple of beer and get goofy. It was good time. Then we talked about whatever popped up in our minds.
More often, I complained that I don’t have friends. But I do enjoy sometimes. When my roommate irritates me, unintended, I go out. In other words, I walk away. A change of environment a people just makes my day better. I could be very mean when someone pulls the trigger. I know this. So sometimes I rather leave the whole messy situation than staying and letting my insanity rule.
Somehow, this just sounds like I am Hulk. Well, there’s a Hulk living inside of my heart. I try not to free this destructive figure out of the inner me. I control it.
Food calms me down actually. Good food puts me to sleep and gives me a break from irritations.
Multiple things have been gone since I’ve moved in this apartment. They just disappear. How can I not be upset or depressed? My things are GONE, for no reason. Oh well, should I just let Hulk come out and deal with it? I should have let Hulk take care of this.
Today’s cake calms me down a little. Pekara Bakery in downtown Champaign has become one of the places I escape to. I escape from my apartment to here and write my research paper. I came here to chill after internship in the children’s museum.
It’s all good, HULK.
I am doing just okay.